Where the reader starts, and what to say first¶
Fictional teaching packets unless a fact is marked as verified. Each packet states what the copy may claim.
One product, three starting points¶
Facts: a fictional font editor, version 5, adds a view that shows all masters of a glyph side by side. The upgrade from version 4 costs EUR 49. No trial change, no measured saving.
Owner of version 4 (knows the problem, the tools, the product and the price):
Version 5: every master of a glyph in one view
Version 5 shows all masters of the selected glyph side by side. The upgrade from version 4 costs EUR 49.
Someone comparing editors (knows the problem and that tools exist):
When a family has several masters, the drawing that looks right in one weight can drift in another. Version 5 places every master of a glyph side by side, so you can follow one curve across the weights before you interpolate.
A lettering artist who has not thought about masters (knows only the work):
You have drawn the regular. The bold is next, and the letters must still look like the same family. That is the job a master view helps with: the weights sit side by side while you draw.
Each opening starts where its reader already is. None promises that the view fixes drift; it shows the masters together and the reader still judges.
The message before the copy¶
A private message note for the same packet:
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| What does it do? | Shows every master of a glyph side by side |
| How? | A view in the glyph window [CONFIRM LABEL: view name] |
| Why consider it? | Comparing masters by switching views is slow to judge by eye |
| Why change? | Version 4 shows one master at a time |
| Why now? | Version 5 is available; no other reason supplied |
| Ten words | Version 5 shows every master of a glyph side by side |
The empty “why now” stays factual. No deadline is invented to fill it.
The salesperson test¶
Draft line:
Experience a revolutionary new way to perfect your type families.
Said aloud at a stand, with the file open, nobody would say this. A colleague would say:
Here are all four masters of this “g”. Watch the tail as you go from light to bold.
The second line is a demonstration in words. It survives the test because it points at the work.
Openings that keep their promise¶
Facts: a fictional vector app's guide explains why a cutter rejects an SVG: open paths, overlapping strokes and unconverted text. Each has a check in the app.
Bait: You'll never believe why your cutter hates you.
Kept promise: Three reasons a cutter rejects an SVG, and the check for each.
The second headline names what the reader will have when they finish. The article must deliver all three checks; if it covers two, the headline says two.
Candidates from different points of entry, for the same guide:
| Entry | Candidate |
|---|---|
| Task | Prepare an SVG your cutter will accept |
| Object | Open paths, overlaps, live text: what a cutter refuses |
| Question | Why does my cutter reject this SVG? |
| Result | A cutter-ready SVG in three checks |
Choose by surface. The question suits a help page and a search result; the task suits a tutorial heading.
In a crowded category, the mechanism leads¶
Before writing a headline for a crowded category (auto-trace, font conversion, "AI for designers"), read a dozen recent headlines from the products the reader compares us with. If they share one claim, put the mechanism first and let the familiar claim follow as shorthand:
Smart corners keep the sharp node underneath, so the radius can still change next week.
not "Faster, smoother corners". A larger number is never the answer to a crowded market.
Starting points move: after a release, last month's prospects are owners. Recheck the reader before reusing a headline that worked.
The first sentence and the caption¶
The first body sentence only has to get the second one read: short, easy, nearly free of qualification. Captions are read more than body text, so each one carries the product name and a complete claim on its own:
In version 5, the master view shows every master of a glyph side by side.
Where the product name goes¶
Name the product in the headline on product pages, upgrade notices, store listings and advertisements to readers who know the category; a news headline names the version and the change. An article for a reader who has not yet named the problem leads with their work and names the product where it does the job.
Select the reader, do not flatter them¶
Status: For serious creative professionals.
Task: For people who cut vinyl, card or wood from line artwork.
The task line lets the right reader recognize themselves and the wrong reader leave without being told they are not serious.
Verified example: Vextra's opening¶
From the house's reviewed Vextra landing draft: the page opens with what the plug-in adds, names the actions as verbs and keeps the reader's existing material in view: “Underneath, it's still your ordinary Illustrator path, with your fill, stroke, and undo history intact.” The promise (edit paths like a font editor) is paid in the next sentences by six path tools, presented as the actions you take.
A phrase bank for openings¶
Research notes (fictional rows):
| Phrase (verbatim) | Source | Date | Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| “my cutter goes round the letter twice” | forum thread | 2026-04 | Symptom of overlapping strokes |
| “cut file” | tutorial comment | 2026-06 | Makers' noun for the exported vector file |
A heading from the bank: “Why your cutter goes round a letter twice, and the fix.” The heading uses the reader's words; the steps below it use the exact interface labels. Keep verbatim phrases, sources and your interpretation in separate columns, and never present a phrase from public discussion as praise.